handfuls of air

Ah, this aching, familiar place.

This pit of unknown in the stomach

I began to forget. Then came

the flop and the turn. The innocent

relaxation. I opened

my big fat mouth.

I said something wrong,

I think, then the heat in your eyes

- the heat perhaps that I crave -

ignited. You tumbled down

into this darkness and pulled me in

with you, and now we must climb

through the tears and the tension

back towards a quiet stasis.

But maybe I don't want to go.

Maybe I love it down here

in this chaos with you.

Maybe this is where I belong.